Chapter 31 Dew—Part Four

After summoning Wen Ning, Wei WuXian’s mental state was somewhat chaotic, making it difficult for him to remain alert. And if Lan WangJi didn’t want anyone to notice his arrival, he could have easily done so. Therefore, when he turned around and saw the even colder face beneath the moonlight, his heart almost skipped a beat.

He didn’t know how long Lan WangJi had been here or if he saw or heard what he was doing. If Lan WangJi hadn’t been drunk in the first place and followed him all the way here, the situation would have been even more awkward, especially since he hadn’t said anything in front of Lan WangJi and had sneaked out to call Wen Ning after Lan WangJi had fallen asleep.

Lan WangJi crossed his arms over his chest and hugged Bichen. His expression was extremely stiff. Wei WuXian had never seen him with such a displeased expression before. He felt the need to speak first and explain the situation, defusing the atmosphere. “Ahem, HanGuang-Jun.”

Lan WangJi did not answer.

Standing in front of Wen Ning, Wei WuXian looked at Lan WangJi. He touched his chin and, for some reason, felt extremely guilty.

Lan WangJi finally lowered his hand holding Bichen and took a few steps forward. Seeing him walk toward Wen Ning with his sword in hand, Wei WuXian thought he was going to kill Wen Ning.  Oh no. Don’t tell me Lan Zhan actually pretended to be drunk so he could kill Wen Ning after I called him. Of course he did. No one gets truly drunk after just a bowl.

He said, “HanGuang-Jun, listen to me…”

With a hard blow, Lan WangJi hit Wen Ning.

Although it sounded quite powerful, the blow didn’t actually hurt anyone. Wen Ning only staggered back a few steps afterward. He staggered slightly, regained his balance, and then stood up straight with a blank expression.

Wen Ning wasn’t as easily angered as he used to be, but his temper wasn’t very good either. That night on Dafan Mountain, no one could draw their swords on him before everyone fell—he even grabbed someone by the neck. If Wei WuXian hadn’t stopped him, he would have strangled everyone on the scene. However, even though Lan WangJi had struck him once, his head remained lowered, as if he didn’t dare to fight back. Wei WuXian found this a bit strange, but he was still relieved. If Wen Ning had retaliated and the two had started fighting, it would have been much harder to intervene.

As if he didn’t think one punch was enough to vent his anger, Lan WangJi pushed Wen Ning about thirty feet away. 

He spoke to Wen Ning in an annoyed voice, “Go away.”

Wei WuXian finally realized something was wrong.

Both the slap and the push, both the words and the actions were incredibly… childish.

After pushing Wen Ning far enough, Lan WangJi seemed satisfied. He turned and walked over to Wei WuXian.

Wei WuXian stared at him intently. 

There was nothing wrong with Lan WangJi’s face or expression. He was even more serious, polite, and impeccable than usual. His face wasn’t flushed, and his breathing wasn’t shallow. He walked steadily and confidently. He seemed to still be the calm and pious cultivator, HanGuang-Jun.

But, when he looked down, he found Lan WangJi’s boots were worn on the wrong feet.

Before leaving, he took off Lan Wangji’s boots and threw them beside the bed. Now, Lan Wangji’s left boot was on his right foot, while his right boot was on his left.

HanGuang-Ju, the renowned cultivator who held high etiquette, would never leave the house dressed like this.

Wei WuXian asked hesitantly, “HanGuang-Jun, what number is this?”

He formed the number two with his fingers. Lan WangJi didn’t answer and extended his hands. With one on his left and one on his right, he solemnly grasped both of Wei WuXian’s fingers.

With  a clang  , Bichen fell to the ground due to his master’s negligence.

Wei WuXian, “…”

This is definitely not the usual Lan Zhan!

Wei WuXian, “HanGuang-Jun, are you drunk?”

Lan WangJi, “No.”

Drunk people usually don’t admit they’re drunk. Wei WuXian pulled back his finger. Lan WangJi attentively maintained his gesture, holding Wei WuXian’s fingers with both his hands loosely clenched. Wei WuXian was completely speechless. Standing in the cold night wind, he averted his gaze from Lan WangJi and looked up at the moon.

Most people get drunk before going to bed, but Lan WangJi slept before getting drunk. And, when drunk, his appearance was no different from usual, making it difficult to tell.

In the past, Wei WuXian had many drinking buddies. He had seen hundreds of thousands of ways people acted when drunk. Some wailed loudly, some giggled foolishly, some struggled, some fainted instantly, some were determined to commit suicide, and still others whined, “Why did you leave me?” However, this was the first time he had seen someone like Lan WangJi, who was silent, appeared polite, yet acted so strangely.

The corner of his lips twitched. Trying to hold back laughter, he lifted Bichen off the ground and carried her on his back, “Okay. Let’s go back.”

He definitely couldn’t let Lan Wangji wander around like this. Who knows what else he might do.

Fortunately, Lan WangJi also seemed relaxed even when drunk. With an elegant nod, they left. If anyone passed by, they would surely mistake the two for good friends taking a night stroll and compliment their politeness.

Behind them, Wen Ning silently followed. Just as Wei WuXian was about to speak to him, Lan WangJi turned around and punched him again in anger. This time, his punch landed on Wen Ning’s head.

Wen Ning’s head drooped even further from the blow. Although his facial muscles were stiff and expressionless, and his eyes couldn’t look, for some reason, he still looked like he’d been hurt. Not knowing whether to frown or laugh, Wei WuXian grabbed Lan WangJi’s arm. “Why did you hit him?”

Lan WangJi spoke to Wen Ning in a threatening tone that he definitely wouldn’t have used if he were awake, “Go away!”

Wei WuXian knew he shouldn’t fight a drunk person. He hurried, “Okay, okay. Whatever you want. I’ll throw him out if that’s what you want.” As he spoke, he took out his bamboo flute. However, before he could put it to his lips, Lan WangJi quickly snatched it away, “Don’t play for him.”

Wei WuXian teased, “Why are you so aggressive?”

Lan WangJi repeated angrily, “Don’t play for him!”

Wei WuXian realized that although drunk people often talk a lot, since Lan WangJi usually didn’t like to talk, he would keep repeating the same words after drinking. Considering Lan WangJi had never been much of a fan of demonic techniques, he probably didn’t like how he used his flute to control Wen Ning. In any case, he had to stroke his fur, of course, “Alright. I’ll just play for you, okay?”

Lan WangJi expressed his satisfaction with a  mnn  , but continued to play the flute in his hands, unwilling to return it.

Wei WuXian couldn’t help but whistle. He said to Wen Ning, “Keep hiding. Make sure no one finds you.”

Wen Ning looked like he really wanted to follow him, but after receiving the order and fearing that Lan WangJi would hit him a few more times, he slowly turned around. Dragging the chain behind him, he walked away listlessly.

Wei WuXian turned to Lan WangJi, “Lan Zhan, now that you’re drunk, why isn’t your face red at all?”

Because Lan WangJi looked so normal, almost more normal than Wei WuXian, he couldn’t help but speak to him as if he were talking to an ordinary person. Unexpectedly, however, after Lan WangJi heard this, he reached out, grabbed his shoulder, and pulled him into his embrace.

Startled, Wei WuXian’s head slammed into his chest.

Just as he recovered from his dizziness, Lan WangJi’s voice came from above, “Heartbeat.”

“What?”

Lan WangJi, “His face doesn’t show anything. Listen to his heartbeat.”

As he spoke, his chest trembled with the low voice. His heart beat steadily and steadily.  Thump  ,  thump  . Quite fast. Wei WuXian understood and looked up again, “I wouldn’t be able to tell from your face, only if I listened to your heartbeat?”

Lan WangJi replied sincerely, “Mnn.”

Wei WuXian bowed with a laugh.

Was Lan Wangji’s face so thick that his blush couldn’t be seen? He wasn’t that kind of person, was he?

And, Lan WangJi was so honest after he was drunk. His actions and comments were also… bolder!

Since it was a rare opportunity to see the honest and open Lan WangJi, it was impossible for Wei WuXian to treat him with respect and not cheat.

He hurried Lan WangJi back to the inn. After entering the room, he placed him on the bed and took off his misplaced boots. Thinking he might not know how to wash his face in such a state, he removed Lan WangJi’s forehead ribbon and took a basin of hot water and a towel. After wringing out the towel, he folded it into a square and gently wiped Lan WangJi’s face.

Throughout the process, Lan WangJi didn’t resist at all, obediently allowing his face to be squeezed in every direction. Besides squinting when the towel approached his eyes, he stared at Wei WuXian without blinking. Wei WuXian had a ton of funny ideas in his head. Seeing his clear gaze, he couldn’t help but touch Lan WangJi’s chin with his finger. He laughed, “Why are you staring at me? Am I handsome?”

It just so happened that he had just finished washing himself. Before Lan WangJi could answer, Wei WuXian threw a towel into the basin. “Your face is clean. Do you want some water first?”

Not hearing a response from behind him, he turned around and saw Lan WangJi holding a basin in his hands, his face already buried in it.

Wei WuXian almost paled in shock. He grabbed the basin and quickly moved it away, “I didn’t mean to get water in here!”

Lan WangJi raised his head calmly. Clear drops of water flowed down his jaw, seeping into the front of his shirt collar. Looking at him, Wei WuXian was at a loss for how to describe his current feelings.  …Did he drink the water or not? Hopefully, Lan Zhan wouldn’t remember anything after waking up. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be able to see anyone for the rest of his life.

Wei WuXian wiped the water droplets off Lan WangJi’s jaw with his sleeve and hugged him, “HanGuang-Jun. Now, will you do whatever I tell you to do?”

Lan WangJi, “Mnn.”

Wei WuXian, “You will answer whatever I ask?”

Wei WuXian knelt on the bed and grinned, “Okay. Let me ask you something. Did you… secretly taste the Emperor’s Smile you’ve been hiding in your room?”

Lan WangJi, “No.”

Wei WuXian, “Do you like rabbits?”

Lan WangJi, “Ya.”

Wei WuXian, “Have you ever broken the rules before?”

Lan WangJi, “Ya.”

Wei WuXian, “Have you ever liked someone?”

Lan WangJi, “Ya.”

Wei WuXian’s questions were all just for fun, not because he was genuinely curious about Lan WangJi’s personal affairs. He simply wanted to see if Lan WangJi would actually answer whatever he asked. He continued, “What about Jiang Cheng?”

A frown, “Hmph.”

Wei WuXian, “Bagaimana dengan Wen Ning?”

Indifference, “Huh.”

Wei WuXian grinned and pointed at himself, “How about this one?”

Lan WangJi, “Milikku.”

“…”

Lan WangJi looked at him, then said slowly and clearly, “Mine.”

Wei WuXian suddenly understood.

He lowered Bichen from his back, thinking to himself,  When I pointed at myself, Lan Zhan probably thought that “this person” was Bichen.

He got out of bed and walked around the room carrying Bichen, from left to right, from east to west. As he had expected, Lan WangJi’s gaze followed him wherever he went, so sincere and straightforward, so straightforward and honest.

Wei WuXian’s legs nearly gave out under Lan WangJi’s scorching gaze. He lifted Bichen before his eyes, “Do you want it?”

Lan WangJi, “I want it.”

As if this wasn’t enough to prove his desire, Lan WangJi grasped Wei WuXian’s hand that was holding Bichen and stared into his eyes with those bright pupils. Taking a deep breath, he repeated his words, emphasizing each syllable, “…I want it.”

Wei WuXian knew that Lan WangJi was dead drunk, and the words weren’t directed at him, but the three words still hit him, sapping the strength in his arms and legs.

He thought to himself, Lan Zhan, what kind of person is he… If he is so sincere, so enthusiastic towards a girl, then what kind of man must he be!

After recovering from the blow, Wei WuXian asked again, “How do you recognize me? Why did you help me?”

Lan WangJi opened his mouth. Wei WuXian moved a little closer, wanting to hear his answer. However, Lan WangJi’s expression suddenly changed. With one push, he pushed Wei WuXian onto the bed.

The candle light was extinguished with a wave of his hand. Bichen was thrown to the ground again by his master.

Wei WuXian’s vision spun dizzily from the push. He thought Lan WangJi had woken up, “Lan Zhan?!”

A familiar spot behind his back was tapped once. His entire body felt sore and numb, and he couldn’t move at all, similar to the first night in the Cloud Recesses. Lan WangJi pulled his hand away, lay down beside him, and covered them, carefully tucking the corner of the blanket at Wei WuXian’s side. “It’s already nine o’clock. Get some rest.”

So, anyway, that was the Lan Sect’s dreaded bedtime routine.

After the interrogation stopped, Wei WuXian looked up at the ceiling, “Can’t we rest and chat at the same time?”

Lan WangJi, “No.”

…Alright. Someday, there would definitely be a chance to get Lan WangJi drunk again. Sooner or later, the answer would be revealed.

Wei WuXian, “Lan Zhan. Put that away. I have two rooms for us. We don’t need to squeeze into the same bed.”

After a moment of silence, Lan WangJi’s hands moved and, after fumbling with the blanket for a while, slowly began to untie the ribbons that held his clothes together. Wei WuXian exclaimed, “Okay! That’s enough! I didn’t mean for you to untie them in this way!!! Okay!!! Sure! I’ll lie down and sleep!!!”

A deadly silence filled the darkness.

After a moment of silence, Wei WuXian spoke again, “I finally understand why your sect forbids alcohol. You pass out after just one bowl and can’t tell good liquor from bad. If everyone in the Lan Sect is like this when they’re drunk, you deserve to be banned from drinking. Anyone who drinks should be beaten.”

With his eyes closed, Lan WangJi raised his hand and covered Wei WuXian’s mouth.

He paused, “Shhh.”

The breath Wei WuXian wanted to take was caught between his chest and mouth, unable to rise or fall.

It seemed that, ever since he returned, every time he decided to tease Lan WangJi like he did in the past, he always suffered the consequences of his own actions.

This shouldn’t have happened! Where exactly did it go wrong?!

Translator’s Notes

Here’s a funny comment I found, which the author himself liked:

By the way, the name of Wei Ying’s (Wei WuXian) friend who cried and asked “why did you leave me?” while drunk is Luo BingHe, right?

(Confused? Check out the author’s first work, The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System)